


Jet Black Heart

by mukeandziamgotmelike (orphan_account)



Series: Songfics [6]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: A little, Friendship, M/M, Racism, Sad, Songfic, bc people are ignorant, twitter hate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 07:13:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5576086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/mukeandziamgotmelike
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>//'Cause I've got a jet black heart, and there's a hurricane underneath it trying to keep us apart. I write with a poison pen, but these chemicals moving between us are the reason to start again.//</p><p>-OR-</p><p>After leaving One Direction, Zayn has felt better. He feels happier; more accomplished. Except for one thing. And that's his unresolved falling out with one Louis Tomlinson.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jet Black Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Based off "Jet Black Heart" by 5 Seconds of Summer. (Aka the reason for my tears)
> 
> I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG! I NEED TO GET A CALENDER OR SOMETHING JESUS CHRIST
> 
> This was requested by Mychaela. I hope you like it love! :)

*****

Ever since he's left One Direction, Zayn has felt more confident. He's able to do everything on his own, all the credit goes to him, and he feels more accomplished. He won't be compared to the rest of his band anymore.

 

But still…

 

He still gets hate, even over seven months later. People still say he's a terrorist, (though he doesn't think that will ever go away) and some are even asking if he left One Direction to join ISIS. It hurts a lot, but he tries not to let it bother him.

 

However, there's one thing that still chills Zayn to the bone.

 

He and Louis hadn't spoken to each other since the Twitter war, mainly because Louis was pissed. He had always been the most short tempered of the group, the one who would deliberately set a house on fire if you gave him a match.

 

Zayn and Louis were best friends, and Zayn missed that. It's depressing how fast everything seems to have faded to gray.

 

*****

 

After the Paris attacks, the hate had gotten much worse. People were assuming that Muslims were the cause, which is an offense to Zayn in its own, but a number of people were sending him hate. He wasn't in ISIS, he was just Muslim. Apparently, that was a crime now.

 

Usually, he would just push it aside, like he always does when this sort of thing happened.

 

Unfortunately, as hard as he tried, he couldn't do that this time. Before he could think twice, he had pressed Louis’ contact name. He hears the boy answer as the first tears start to fall. “L-Lou?” He asks, choking on a sob. There's an exasperated sigh from the other line. “What do you want?”

 

 “C-Can you please come over? There's just so much hate and I can't…” He trails off, his sobs shaking his body. He hears a more gentle sigh and hopes that Louis is at least considering agreeing. He prays that Louis will see through all their fights, prays that he's not that shallow.

 

He hears the phone beep and pulls it back from his ear to see that Louis hung up. He pulls his knees into his chest and let's out another sob.

 

There's a knock on his door and Zayn wipes his eyes, getting up to answer it. He opens the door and sees Louis standing there. He knows that Louis only came out of guilt, because he heard Zayn crying. There's a part of Zayn that wants to push him away, to tell him to leave him alone. It's worked before, but the more sensible part of his knows he can't do that. Not this time.

 

He latches himself onto Louis’ waist, letting out all the pain he's feeling. The boy mutely hugs him back, as a reminder of ‘I'm here, I won't leave you now.’ 

 

Louis leads him inside, sitting them both down on the couch. “Why have you been pushing us all away?” The older boy asks, trying to keep the sass out of his voice but Zayn can clearly sense the underlying hurt.

 

“I was scared. So scared and blinded by all the things he told me and I knew it was wrong after I did it, but I didn't do anything about it and it was just…” He trails off, looking down at his hands, the tears still freely falling.

 

Louis brushes his hair away from his forehead and Zayn looks up at him. He sees in the older boy's eyes that he doesn't want to lose their friendship. He wants to fight for it, but doesn't have the courage to say so. He doesn't have to. Zayn knows.

 

Zayn wraps his arms tightly around Louis’ neck. The boy reciprocates and buries his face in the raven haired boy's neck. It's not the same as before, not by a long shot. But it's good enough and Zayn says a thank you to anyone listening.

 

They stay like that, hugging each other, holding on for dear life. Like if they let go, they would be pulled away again.

 

Louis does loosen his grip a little eventually, but Zayn still has an arm wrapped around his shoulders. He looks at his phone, sees it's after eleven o'clock, and starts to stand up. “Wait,” Zayn starts. The older boy looks at him curiously.

 

“Stay.”

 

Louis looks down at him, and Zayn sees the exact same look in his eyes as before. “We can fix this. We can go back to how it was.” He says, his voice cracking a little from trying to not start crying again.

 

“Please,” He adds, his voice small.

 

“You know I want to.” Louis replies, looking away from Zayn's sad eyes. “Then why are you trying to convince yourself that you don't?” The Muslim boy asks and Louis sighs. “I don't want to get you back and then lose you again. You pushed everyone away, Zayn. Between leaving us and dropping your fiancé…” He starts and Zayn feels him being swept away again. He refuses to let that happen. “I'm so sorry about everything I put you through. You didn't deserve that at all. We were best friends, and I just threw that all away.” 

 

Louis nods. “I was just trying to help you. To help you realize that what you were doing shouldn't have changed anything. I wanted things to be back to normal.” 

 

Zayn sighs. He wants to go back to normal, too. Some part of him knows that that can't happen, though. They'll never be ‘back to normal’, but Zayn will take as much as he can get. “I missed you so much.” He says and Louis smiles. “I missed you too, mate. As much as I love Harry, Niall, and Liam; I need my partner in crime more than I like to admit.” The younger boy laughs a little.

 

 Louis looks down after that hesitantly. He had this slightly scared look in his eyes, like he didn't want to start believing Zayn until he knows for sure. If Zayn will stay. Zayn knows that it's his own fault. He was the one who made so many mistakes, done so many things wrong. As soon as he realizes this, his eyes fill with tears.

 

He doesn't deserve Louis’ forgiveness. 

 

Louis turns to Zayn when he hears a choked sob. “I'm so sorry about everything. I'm so, so, sorry Lou…” The older boy wraps his arms around Zayn. “Let's forget about that right now. We'll just forget about it and start over, okay?” 

 

Zayn nods a little, sniffling. “Okay.” Louis kisses his cheek lightly and the younger boy feels like the color just bursts back into the world. 

 

Like he's returning to life.

 

“Our friendship is way too much to lose.” Louis says. “How mad were you?” “Why don't you ask the wall in my room with a hole in it?” The older boy asks rhetorically and Zayn laughs. 

 

“I didn't mean that. The whole ‘remember when you had a life’ thing. I wasn't thinking straight and was being stupid.” He says and Louis shrugs. “You've never been one to think straight.” Zayn slaps him on the arm. “Shut up, you are literally dating Harry.” 

 

This is just like before, and Zayn doesn't want to lose it ever again. He's pretty sure Louis doesn't want to either.

 

*****

 

They decided to put everything behind them. They would forget everything; the animosity, the betrayal, the anger, all of it. They would start fresh, because their friendship was too much to lose.

 

They didn't know what lied ahead, and they didn't have to. They were taking a dive into the dark.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_fin_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Leave requests for boyxboy songfics :)


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